Friday, July 17, 2009

My Questions to Your Answers

So, I wasn't expecting questions that required so much soul searching and thought! Y'all know this Southern girl likes to save her brain cells for crunching the budget numbers so she can figure out how to get a Kindle 2! ;) I'm just teasing, but I was really impressed with the questions via comments and email.

Well, let's get started answering them, shall we?

If you could change one thing about your hubby, what would it be?

Hmmm...that is a tough one. I love the man. Love the man, I really do. But sometimes I wish he drove a little faster. He's used to Midwestern driving. Down here in Texas, it's move or get out of the way! In all seriousness I do wish he was born south of the Mason Dixon line. I don't think Yankees really get the passion for traditions that us Southerners have. He doesn't really understand it, so I have to explain things to him that come normal to me. For example, when he first moved here from up north, he was a little weirded out by the amount of "Texas" stores that were in the malls. Yes, we Texans love our state so much that we create stores that have nothing but Texas stuff in them- flags, frames with flags on them, framed Texas flags, flag magnets, flag t-shirts, Texas shaped ice cube trays, flag wrapping paper, well, you get the idea. :)

taken on the shores of Mexico

If you could establish a residence anywhere in the world, where would you go?

This one was a little confusing. I didn't know if she meant to live there permanently or to just have a residence there, like a vacation house.

For a permanent residence and inside the U.S, I'd love to live somewhere up in New England. Love the fall weather there (fall is my fave season!), love the cool temps, love the accents, love the scenery, love the ocean, love it all! :) Of course, I'd have to keep a residence here in Texas. And since we're dreaming, it would be a ranch with a couple of golf holes and putting greens for SH and a tennis court for me. Oh, and a full time baseboard cleaner and mac n' cheese maker.

For a permanent residence outside of the U.S, I think it would have to Turks and Caicos. SH and I had a blast there when we went to celebrate our 1 year wedding anniversary. We dream of owning a few villas and renting them out to tourists. A year round tan...ahh, that would be the life.

I was wondering if you experience much criticism from relatives, acquaintances or from the blog world for the way you lead your life? I too am similar to you in the ways that I am a housewife with fur children and a baby on the way and I was curious if you did get this kind of criticism, is it often and why do you think you get that kind of treatment, if you do at all? I read some of your past posts and noticed a little bit of an attack coming from some readers who seemed to be bothered by your personal choices.

Well, in a nutshell, yes I did. I have a degree in Education my parents think I'm wasting my degree. A lot of my friends are stay at home mommies themselves, so criticism from friends is not a problem. Outside of my parents, no one really says much. My grandmother loves it, but then again, she literally was a 50's housewife.

Now, the blog world is a whole different beast. I put my own opinions out here cause the majority of the girls/women I reach are housewives/stay at home moms themselves, or they plan on being one after they get married or after they have children. Every so often, I do get a super outspoken gal who wants me to know I'm setting women back to the dark ages and ruining what feminists fought so hard for and yada yada. Unless it is a vicious or mean spirited personal attack, I don't even respond. It doesn't faze me. But when they start getting nasty, that's when I just can't keep my big mouth shut. I tend to let me anger get the best of me. But I'm really working on this and working on a spirit of meekness.

I don't know why all people feel so strongly one way or another. Personally, for me, it's a religious thing. I feel this is where God wants me to be at this point in my life. Do I feel all women should be homemakers? Yes and no. I think God wants us to be a part of a realize the joys of homemaking but there are some women in the world that are meant to have certain careers, just as there are some women for who aren't meant to have/need children. Let's take a nurse in war. Wounded and often spiritually beaten soldiers need the comfort at gentle care that only women can bring to bring them to health. Our soft qualities and traits are often a blessing to the careers women tend to seek- teacher, nurse, hospitality, beauty, etc. (And I'm not saying that men cannot be teachers, nurses, whatever. It's just that we *can* be better at some trades. I know I couldn't be a construction worker!) Does this sound a bit sexist. Yeah, probably. But I'm working hard on not pushing my ideals on others because I don't appreciate when they do it to me. Oh, I can feel the fans of flames coming on! ;)

The Southern Housewife with two of her mama friends

What's the best advice for keeping up with friends who are in different stages of life?

Whew, this one is a toughie. I'm actually going through this issue right now with my friends. At the age we're getting, the majority of SH and my friends are starting to have babies. Like I said prior, we're not quite sure if this whole baby thing is for us. So what does this mean? It means, we don't get invited to kid's birthday parties, which is totally fine with us! lol It means not being in on play dates, park dates, etc. And it doesn't hurt our feelings at all. We understand and those type of events are just not for us. But it does hurt because I miss my pals when I don't see them a lot.

So, we try to make more of an effort to plan adult only events with them. This requires:
  • more heads up that what we used to give back when there were no kids. Back then, we could just call each other up and be ready to hang out in 30 mins flat. Now, they need a lot more time to plan because of babysitters and such.

  • more of an effort on our part (or those without the kids) to make the actual plans. My friends with kids have a lot going on in their lives with the children. This is not to say we have no lives, but it's a lot easier for us to squeeze in a 30 minute calling/email session setting things up and getting the plans rolling. Is this fair? Nah, not really. But it's what you have to do when you want to see you besties. :)

That's all I have in me right now for answers. I'll get to the others this weekend or Monday. Stay tuned, cause the next ones have a couple of decor info in them. How fun!

I've decided that I'm not going to do another post on meekness. After reviewing my last ones, I think I sort of said it all. Anything else would be a bit redundant.

Happy fun and sun filled Friday! Blessings to you all :)

xoxo Y

UPDATE: I just read the last comment on my previous post from anonymous. That post is really making me think! And don't worry anonymous, in no way did I take it as rude or critical. It really is eye opening and is making me think positive things! Before I answer, I'm going to pray and think some more about it cause I can see how it will be self-improving to do so. Thank you very much for your thoughtfully laid out comments. :) They are very much appreciated!! And please know that those messy rooms did get cleaned up- I should have showed the after pictures. But the gym..yeah, I didn't make it to the gym. ;p -SH

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